Somewhere Between Love, Life, and Friendship

I don't know about you guys, let's just be an agree to disagree. I do really want to write this in purpose to share my thoughts about this world. Especially, how this world-reality could affect our emotions, our ways of thinking, our social life, our dateline, our romances, etc. Remember what I have said, agree to disagree.

Two out of Three
In this world, we have to always face a situation where we should choose. Believe me, it sucks to choose. Because you can't choose all the options that are offered. For example, when you are offered to have a breakfast : Toast or Egg? You can't choose all of them. Well, maybe some of you could, but the main idea is to show you that we have to sacrifice one of the option. Later in this post, you will know when you can pick all of the options.

You could only choose two out of three; between Life, Love, or Friendship at this early. But when the time has come, you can choose all of them.

Be realistic, if you think you can manage well all of the them right now, I would say good luck. But in the end, you may sacrifice one of those things; either it's your life, your love story, or friendship. It doesn't seem concrete at the beginning. It will turn out after you realize that you lose something you can't change.

How to grow it back? If it is a person, it's not easy to make him/her back to you. Because when 'LOSE' is mentioned, it's mean it's gone. Yep, gone. But hey, there is a bright side from this lost. If it's not a person but it came from the part of yourself (your desires and passions), cheer up! You are possible to grow it back. Well, look deep inside yourself. You know what yourself need. Have a time for yourself, have fun, do some crazy things, and think that everything will be alright. Try new things that you never tried before. Believe me, if you do it right, congratulations you've just became the better version of you.

Patience does Matters
Remember my quote above? I did mention about 'time' right? Actually ladies and gentlemen, that's true.

This is the fact, you could only choose two from Life, Love, or Friendship. When the time is right, you will be able to choose all of them.

So, what do I mean by mentioning 'time'?

'When the time is right', I mean is when you meet your life-partner. Because he/she will become your life, your lover, and also your friend.

So, it's all make sense eh? It's all about patience. The question is, how long I should wait? I know that people vary on their patience level. So that's why God gave us different time to wait.

Some people are given a short time to wait, but some people don't. They have to wait longer. But it's worth waiting for. The problem come when they don't have any patiences to wait.

Underline the last sentence of it, especially on 'problem'. Refer back to previous chapter, that's the problem. For example when you choose Love and Life, than you may lost Friendship. Some of your friends may change due to it. On the other hand, when you choose Love and Friendship, you don't have a life. You don't even have a time for yourself, your college, your job, your health. Because you only do care about the other two. Then, how about Life and Friendship? You know the answer.

33.3%, Can I?
I don't think it's a good idea to choose all of them. (Oh damn it, blackout!) It's because you can't work all of them maximally. Ideally, you think you're doing good, but in reality, you're abandoning one of them that you don't even realize before they tell to you.

Don't be sad or depressed after you read my post. Well, this is only my opinion. But if I have to choose, I'd prefer to wait, or choose Friendship and Life. How about Love? *chuckles*
Love is the only thing in those options that we can't control, and understand when it will come. But friendship and life, you can find them everywhere and manage them well, then you'll get a happy life.

My reason why I choose to wait :

'When the time is right', I mean is when you meet your life-partner. Because he/she will become your life, your lover, and also your friend.

Earth is spinning around, life must go on.
(:

How to Get Over a Girl You Loved So Much

I have a request from a friend of mine to write about this topic. You may think that this is simple, and you may think that you don't need people's help to move on. Well, agree to disagree. Every people have their own way to move on or to get over a girl/a boy they loved so much. But believe me, getting over your ex or a girl that you loved so much-but-she-didn't-accept-you-as-her-boyfriend is a great dilemma of manhood.

Back to my purpose of writing this. Hmm, actually I write this to relieve my burdens. I admit that I had this kind of problem a few days ago, and guess what? These ways work. This morning, I saw her and his boyfriend walk together, and I didn't feel anything. Well, to be honest my hands were shaking, and trust me, it's better since it''s not my heart was shaking.

Set Up Your Mind
First thing first, keep in your mind that she has gone already. You don't have a chance to be her love anymore.

Stop acting like she was the God's gift to you.

She is not the one you're waiting for. To be honest, bad-mouthing her. Is it too harsh? Well, accept the truth that she-didn't-accept-you is far more harsh than this. Once you set that she is too negative to be yours, move on.

Give Some Spaces
This is really important. You have to must change. No more Mr. Nice Guy who always available for her anytime. Move away from her life. You can't be the old you again for her.

Maybe you said some crap about trying to stay friends, maybe you made some idiot vow to “always be there for each other,” but forget it. Both of you have changed.

That means no chats, no phone calls, no talks, no Facebook, no twitter. The main thing is, do not contact her at any cost. Well, they're not permanent anyway. At least, until you've your feelings under your control. Until you are on the platonic level relationship with her. But please do remember that you can't be that close again with her. You should know when to get close, and when to back off from her.

Talk to Your Friends
Share this problems with your friends. Let them know who is the girl behind this. Mention her name, even though your friends are her friends too, it's okay. By telling them your problems, you've released a megaton of burdens from you and shared it to the others.

But be wary of friends trying to connect you with another person right now, this is not what you need. Simply say, "No, thanks".

You need to be surrounded by people who love you, give you support, and feel empathy toward you. They will help you to see that your self are too worth it for her. You're too nice to be her's.

You aren't Okay with That
Some of you may think like this,

I have to be strong, I must not cry.

 or maybe like this,

I don't want to look pitiful. I have to smile.

well I would like to say I am sorry, you're wrong. Cry if you want to cry. Sing a sad song to forget her. Write a heart-break poem, a song. Write all your feelings down there. You may show it to her if you want to. Do not pretending that you're okay, in fact you're not okay.

Just a last simple statement from me.

When your love line only works one way, that means you're too nice to be her's. She is only worth it to be your friend, not life-mate. Move on, stop putting hopes and expectations toward her. Find your own happiness.

|-) 

FRIEND ZONE

Yes, the post that I have been waiting for a long time. Many thanks to Christopher Zhou who gave me this inspiration.

Have you guys ever been friend zoned? Yeah that sucks and hard to tell your self what to do. Seems like every steps you take are wrong and lead to another problem with YOURSELF. Yes, yourself.
But it depends on why you're being stuck in a friend zone. Is it because (1) you're comfortable with it and really comfortable, or (2) you're pretending to be comfortable?
I will not tell you about option number (1), because I think most people don't have a problem with it. That means, you're really want to be her friend.The (2) problem is what I want to discuss here. Later on, I will share the solutions for the problem.

Friends or Lovers?
Sometimes we have a crush with our friend, even though we've already knew for a long time, but it could happen, couldn't it? Every morning when you wake up from your deep sleep, you think of her. Then, without you realize, you will always think about her until you met her. Your heart rate increases, and you feel so damn happy, nothing to worry about, although you will have an exam in the next one hour. 
Does she feel the same thing that you feel? Does she know what are you feeling right now? My suggestion, don't tell it too late. Tell her soon, that you have this feeling. Confess, and wait for her reactions. She may be surprised and doesn't know what she must do. You will have two answers here, (1)"Why do you suddenly tell me this?" (2)"I'm really sorry. You're the best thing I had in my life. But, I don't have love feelings toward you. I like you as a friend".
Option number (1) means that you're not friend-zoned. Congratulations! Now, approach her as a man, not as her friend, but still keeps your friendship, because believe it or not, your love line is determined from your friendship, and in the end you will have a happy ending with her. Your friend is also your love.

Life is Harsh. Too Harsh.
Option (2) means that you HAVE TO move on. You are not aiming for a friendship here. No matter what you do, or what you've done, I'm sorry, you've been friend-zoned. That means, you should not pretending you're okay when you see her with another guy. You should not pretending that you didn't think of her every minutes. You should not pretending that you're okay when you sacrificed your time, your self for her even though you can't be her's.

there's a saying, "Good guys finish last." ever heard of it? it shows how the better someone is, the less chance they have on romance.

She knows that you're a nice person, too nice for her. That means, you are perfect. She would think that you don't need her to fix you. There is no any reason for her to be there with you. Well, that's a reason.

a more negative view on this would be because they're that good, there's a subconscious insecurity, that they'd make their partner look bad

. . .

now what if they won't take you seriously? well there's a limit to everything, especially if you threaten the friendship they value so much

That's a problem when she is a person who values friendship so much. Friends mean everything to her.
I used to think that I can make this life became my ideal. I realized that I was wrong. This is real life, and life is too harsh. You must do what you must do, don't pretend as if everything is okay, and my this is what I want with my life, even though YOU ARE NOT OKAY WITH THAT. Leave, and never come back unless you've got those feelings under your control. You must be asking a silly question like this, "will I come back to her with the old me?". The answer is no. Both of you have changed, and you can't became what you used to be for her.
We can't blame our self or her. This is not a specific person's fault. The situation made the friend zone itself.
So, here is the thing, what you need to do in order to not in friend zone, if friendship is not what you are looking for.

that means maintaining the right amount of balance--knowing when to get close and to back off, when to be there and to leave them alone.

That is setting your direction. Accept the truth.

if you call yourself friend zoned, then realize it and do (or don't do) something about it. set the direction. take charge.

credits (thx bro!)

Be Loved

Love is not a feeling.

It is hard to understand when we’re not at it.

Sometimes we ask ourselves,

“Is this what they called ‘love’?”

So what is love exactly.

Mystery of universe seems fit to it.

You won’t understand unless it is in you.

Like a dynamite which can blow you up.

Unrequited.

Take a deep breath, and let it go.

Or like heaven’s breeze that lift you up.

Requited.

 

Is love given by God?

When? Where?

One thing I know, life is a journey.

A journey to find.

Love, wealth, happiness.

Love is related.

I will eventually find her.

Worth to wait, ain’t waste my life.

Problembh

Key-i-pi-ow. Apa itu kepo? Gw jelasin dulu satu hal sama kalian, kepo itu bukan makanan dan bukan nama hewan. Jujur dari awal gw denger kata kepo, gw berimajinasi tentang makanan yang terbuat dari sayuran dan rasanya asin-asin nendang. Bahkan gw sempet berfantasi kalau kepo itu sejenis kodok yang gak bisa berenang. Well, kepo itu bisa dibilang mau tau urusan orang lain. Kalau nggak tau urusan orang yang bersangkutan itu, dia bakalan penasaran maksimal.

There are some people who don’t care about other people business, but there are some who care. Menurut gw sih bagus klo emang kalian care sama masalah orang lain. Itu artinya lo bener-bener perhatian sama orang itu, tapi kadang ada masalah yang berada di lingkungan private. Mungkin dia bener-bener gak bisa share masalah itu ke orang lain.

To be honest, gw nggak terlalu perduli sama urusan orang lain. Apalagi sama masalah-masalah yang memang sepele tapi menjadi besar karena diurut sama Mak Erot. It is not because I’m a selfish or ignorant person, but let them be. Yes, let them be. You have your own life and your own problem. Mind your own business.

People are extravision. We have high curiousity about anything. Terus, siapa yang salah? Kita kepo kadang-kadang salah. Kita cuek juga salah. Well, I think I have the solution.

1. Jangan ceritain klo lo punya masalah di situs jaringan sosial apapun klo itu adalah masalah sepele yang lo sebenarnya bisa pecahkan sendiri. If you need a friend to share, ask directly. For your information, kalau kalian punya masalah pribadi, dan kalian update itu di facebook atau twitter, well believe me. You’ve just spread negative power. Actually, seorang teman bakal lebih seneng klo ada seseorang yang minta pendapatnya langsung  tanpa melalui twitter, atau facebook.
2. Kalau lo ngeliat temen lo lagi murung atau lagi diem, atau mungkin lagi nggak kaya biasanya, jangan dibawa ke dukun atau ke sirkus. Jangan dipikirin, karena semakin lo pikirin, lo bakal semakin penasaran, dan akhirnya lo ngegalau. Keep it in your mind, they don’t share their problems because they can’t, not because they don’t want to.
3. Kalau ternyata orang itu adalah orang yang paling lo care about, dan ternyata dia ngelakuin kasus nomer 1 dan 2, always keep it in your mind : “Every problem come with its solution. Keep believing in God, because He will guide you to find the solution.”

Believe me, gw pernah dapet kasus nomer 3 and it sucks. Tapi akhirnya gw yakin, kalo Tuhan itu selalu memberi solusi buat mereka yang mau mencoba nyelesain masalahnya. Jadi, nggak usah galau kalau ternyata orang yang lo sayang atau care lagi punya problem dan dia gak mau cerita-cerita, tenang aja he/she will be fine kok. Dan kalo emang lo care sama dia, lo harusnya seneng juga ngeliat dia bisa handle masalah dia sendiri.

(Kadang-kadang penulis secara tidak sadar melakukan hal nomor 1)

Chill out fellas!

N+U+M+B

Back with a moody writing! Oh boy. Sebenarnya gw udah lama mau nulis ini, tapi baru kepikiran sekarang, dan baru ada niat sekarang. Oke, lebih baik telat daripada gak sama sekali. Tapi ngomong-ngomong kalimat itu gak berlaku buat semua aspek di kehidupan. Misalnya ada situasi kaya gini : “yang telat hukum gantung”, oke lebih baik gak usah dateng terus kabur ke columbia, kredit lemari. Maksa abis.

Kali ini gw mau cerita ke kalian tentang, gw sendiri. Ya, GUE. Akhir-akhir ini entah kenapa gw ngerasa kalo gw ini numb abis. Padahal sebelumnya tuh gw langganan twitter tiap malem #galau. Sebagian lo mungkin bertanya apa itu numb? Jempol kaki itu thumb. Numb itu adalah suatu kondisi dimana kita gak bisa ngerasain apa-apa. Kita gak bisa ngerasain rasanya kesepian sama broken heart. Kalimat simple stupid-nya itu gak bisa galau.

Nyata banget sama apa yang terjadi sama gw belakangan ini. Gw gak ngerasain apa-apa kalau lagi berinteraksi sama cewek, padahal hati gw yang paling dalam meronta-ronta tapi hati terluar gw pura-pura gak denger. She is special, but not for me nowadays. Gw gak mau kaya gini, tapi di sisi lain gw gak mau kembali lagi jadi diri gw yang sering ngerasa kesepian dan ngegalau sendirian di kamar sambil pegang hape, kegirangan klo ada dia di timeline. Haha, that is silly.

Jujur, gw ada feeling sama seseorang, anehnya gw gak ngerasa apa-apa berada deket dia. Bahkan gw gak ngerasa upset atau apalah kalau dia deket sama orang lain, apalagi sama cowok. Aneh kan? Gw juga ngerasa aneh sama diri gw sendiri. Bahkan saat gw nulis ini pun gw mikir dalam hati gw “gimana kalau gw tetep kaya gini nanti?”. My God, no. My tiny little heart inside tells me she is the one, but I’m so numb I can’t feel my little heart anymore.

September 24, 2011. 11.03 PM.

Song works like a moodlets ring

I really want to say my BIG APPRECIATION for Bruno Mars.

Today, I watched Glee 8th episode and I was so never-happier-than-before. All the things like bride, flowers, suites, smiles, and especially the songs.

Somehow, that songs made a smile on my face, reminded me about how beautiful life will be. Maybe you wonder what are these songs?

How you describe between Love, Like, and Friend

Halo semua~
Kali ini gue mau posting di blog gw yang absurd nan tercinta ini menggunakan Bahasa Indonesia Tidak Resmi.

Kenapa Bahasa Indonesia Tidak Resmi?

Simple, gw gak berani bilang ini cuma Bahasa Indonesia  aja soalnya kalau Bapak Presiden SBY lagi pidato, beliau gak ngomong pake "gue" dan "lu" kan?

Back to topic, apa yang gw mau kasih tau ke kalian lewat posting ini adalah bagaimana kita ngebatasin antara Cinta, Suka, dan Teman.

Maksudnya "Ngebatasin"?

Hmm, maksud gw adalah jangan sampe kalian gak tau batasan klo kita Cinta sama seseorang, Suka sama seseorang, dan sebagai Teman dari seseorang.

Ooooh, yang punya blog sebenarnya CurCol dah nih pasti huahahahaha

*lempar sepatu plus kaos kakinya
*NB : blom dicuci 2 minggu kaos kakinya



Oke, back to topic (again). Yang gw mau kalian perhatiin, dan menurut pengamatan gw juga, Teman lebih bebas ngelakuin apa aja daripada klo udah Cinta. (despite that gross things such as *piiiip* and *piiiiip*)
Oke, contoh konkritnya kayak gini :

1. Klo kita berteman, dan benar-benar berteman, kayaknya nyebut dia dengan "sayang" dan "cinta" itu hal yang biasa dan normal, tapi klo kita ngerasa cinta (belom jadian) sama dia nyebut dua kata itu bener-bener susah mau keluar.
2. Klo kalian berteman, dan teman kalian nyebut-nyebut kalian dengan panggilan kayak "sayang", "cinta", atau "beb" (mungkin?), gue gak merekomendasikan dia buat kalian PDKT-in. Gue gak terlalu bisa jelasin ini kenapa, tapi ini pengalaman penulis. LOL
3. Kalian juga harus bisa menghargai pertemanan, dan mungkin beberapa orang gak setuju kalo pertemanan bisa jadi ke pacaran. Untungnya, gue bukan tipe beberapa orang itu. Gue masih berpegang teguh sama lagunya Mr.A-Z yang "Lucky"

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend

Lucky to have been where I have been

Lucky to be coming home again

They don't know how long it takes

Waiting for a love like this

Every time we say goodbye

I wish we had one more kiss

I'll wait for you I promise you, I will

Syudududu~~